Praxis Speaks

In a recent mediation, I discussed some basic guidelines that will help pave the way to better communication practices between managers and employees.  Often, in the busy day to day operations of a business or organization, these concepts can become secondary to multi-tasking and meeting deadlines.  However, in order to ensure you are being heard appropriately, the following tips should be utilized as a foundation for true understanding and better productivity in the workplace.

1.  Try to avoid impromptu meetings where opinions will be discussed, directives given, or any issues that may be of a sensitive nature.  If at all possible, schedule face to face time each week for this type of dialogue.

 

2.  Use email as an effective tool to get facts and quick data points across.  Topics that are potentially interpretive or subjective should be saved for a phone call or face to face time.  Also, don’t send out multiple emails each day; rather try to list your points as you go and save a rough raft.  Then send out one email at the end of the day with all of the points you want to convey in bullet format.  If the points will merit discussion, include in the email a time and day that you want to speak on the phone or meet face to face to talk.

 

3. When meeting face to face, try to find a place to sit down and talk—the more neutral the better.  Avoid standing if at all possible.

 

4.  When sending emails, AVOID USING CAPITALIZATION, bold facing, or italics for emphasis.  This can send the wrong message.  Be clear by stating only facts in email.  Again, if you think your message needs the additional support of these methods to convey the appropriate message, pick up the phone or meet in person.

 

5.  Be aware of your non verbal language.  Watch your tone, posture, proxemics (where you are in relation to the other person), and be aware of your facial expressions.  Try to practice expressions of warmth to lower your counterpart’s defenses such as smiling, open arms as opposed to arms crossed, nodding, etc.  Think about how you like others to act toward you when sending a message in terms of respect, tact, etc.  However, just because you communicate one way, don’t expect your counterpart to share this approach.     

 

6. If you feel a discussion may become heated, politely excuse yourself until you feel in control of your emotions.  Disengage and then meet later.    

 

7.  Don’t bottle emotions up.  If you need to say something to a colleague, do so.  Make sure, however, that you plan a time with that person to sit down and talk.  Make sure you use tact.

 

8. Lastly, avoid using accusatory language.  Try not to use “you” statements.  Instead of saying, “You make me feel…or you don’t ever…..”, say instead, “I feel that when we talk, I am not….or, I sometimes sense that you may not…”   If you have to add a “you”, make sure you add an “I” first to disarm the other’s defenses.  Also, ask open ended questions and practice excellent listening skills.  Don’t interrupt.  Allow the other person to complete his or her sentence. Also, ask the other person things like, “Why do you think that’s the best way?” or “Can you tell me more about your idea regarding that?”  This will let the other person know you are interested in their thoughts.  Take time to understand. — Brooks Barton